Top Nine Worst Jobs to Have Right Now in Nigeria

Every morning in Nigeria, millions of people wake up and prepare to
go to work. Most do not go to work because they love their jobs but
because they have no other option. It is no longer news that most
people dislike their current jobs.

We came across a funny list of the worst jobs and have modified, it
with insights and research, to come up with this list of 9 worst jobs
one can have right now in Nigeria

This list doesn’t mean we downgrade or look down on people who do
honest, hardwork like the street cleaners etc. This is a list of jobs
that most people, if given an option, will pass over. If you are
currently in any of these jobs you have our empathy.

9. Bus Conductor
There’s the long working hours. There’s the life threatening
occupation of hanging half-outside a speeding bus while keeping an
eye out for passengers. There’s the smoke and the people you have
to deal with everyday.
But the worst -ultimate worst- part of being a bus conductor is
having to shout out the unpronounceable names of bus stop names
while mentally calculating how much change you owe the guy in the
distracting pink shirt. It easily combines our two worst activities:
Shouting unpronounceable bus stop names and mathematics.
That’s why they sweat so much. You would too, if your entire day
consisted of shouting such destinations as:
Oshodioshodioshodiosh
OjuelegbaOnipanPangrooo.
And then solving maths while doing all that. It ain’t easy, we assure
you.

8. PHCN Electrician/Technician
First of all, working for PHCN is already considered not cool by the
general populace. There was this guy in Secondary school whose dad
worked for The Authorities, and every time the lights went off, we’d
all look at him and shake our heads.
So not only is working for PHCN not cool, but being the Electrician/
Pole Guy who has to go around cutting people’s power lines just has
to suck in the worst way. You’re like the bad news guy the Army
sends to tell families they’ve lost someone in battle. Only imaging if
it’s an army that’s already generally hated by the populace.
It’s up to you to ride in that van with the ladder, get to someone’s
house, climb up the pole, disconnect the power, look down, see the
crowd of angry faces waiting for you at the bottom, and decide
whether descending the ladder is the best option for your general
health and longevity.

7. Traffic Control Officials (eg LASTMA)
Everybody’ in Lagos knows who the LASTMA are. Nobody likes them.
There job description consists mostly of stopping you when you
desperately need to be somewhere important and having the most dull
drawn out conversations. You’ll never hear a conversation like: “Oh,
there are the LASTMA. Let’s go hang out with them.”
Or “Hey, let’s get them some drinks shall we?”
Never.
You just know you’re in the wrong line of work if the mere sight of
you causes 20,000 people to start saying mean things about your
uncle’s father’s friend in the village whom they’ve never even met
before.
Plus you are always at the risk of being hit by an angry driver who is
hellbent on not getting caught by you.

6. Banker
Okay, some may not quite agree with including this on the list. To
everybody who wants to be a banker: Undeceive yourselves. Do
yourselves a favor and change your future ambitions as soon as
possible. It is a trap. Banking jobs are sort of like babies. You see
them all cute and cuddly and you’re like, “Awww, I’d really like to
have one of my own.”. Then you decide to have one of you’re own
and one day you’re up by 3 a.m changing diapers and you realize that
somebody, somewhere, engaged in a bit of false advertising.
Bankers have it the worst. Their working hours are horrible. The
Tellers sit behind counters all day counting money (other people’s
money for that matter) and dealing with the most obnoxious
customers (to be honest, we ourselves have been the obnoxious
customer many a time). Then you stay back after work closes and
balance accounts. And if you make some small computing error, you
can’t leave until you sort that out. And then they’re targets and
goals and deadlines and stuff and about 100 million fresh eager
graduates out of school just waiting to take your job.
Next time you go into a bank, show a little compassion will you?
Those people have it hard. There was this guy behind the counter
where I formerly used to bank, and every time I went there, his face
was a cry for help. It was like dud, get me out of here.
You do not want to be a banker. Especially not in Lagos. Trust me.

5. Internet Cafe Owner
Remember 2001? Internet Cafe Owners had it good that year, didn’t
they? Nobody understood what the internet was really about and we
were all easy prey. We’d spend 1 hour waiting for an available
system, hoping the guy with 12 minutes remaining wasn’t going to
purchase more time. Then you’d pay some ridiculous amount for your
one hour ticket. You’d sit there in front of your system for 30
minutes waiting for Yahoo Messenger to finish loading. And at the
end of it, you’d look at the owner and say Thank You Sir, For
Letting Me Use Your Internet Facilities.
Now if you’re an internet cafe owner, it may be beginning to dawn
on you that maybe, just maybe, you’re in the wrong line of business.
Maybe it’s those empty seats. Maybe it’s the drastic reduction in
cashflow. Maybe it’s just how people don’t really need you anymore.
Maybe it’s how people don’t even bother to accuse you of harboring
Yahoo guys.
Everybody’s got a laptop now. And those who don’t have smart
phones. And guess what, they can access the internet too.

4. Plumber
Quite possibly, and this is just an assumption made after a few
months of casual observation, Lagos has the worst drainage system
in the world. There are literally hundreds of thousands of houses in
Lagos. This translates to millions of toilets flushing at any point on
time. Most cities in Nigeria as well do not have even fairly decent
drainage systems
We don’t want to dwell on this too much, but imagine for a moment
the nasty surprises that await the Plumber. Imaging the sort of
surprises that get mixed up in the convoluted network that runs
beneath the city.
You’d turn up to fix a blocked pipe in Festac, and before you know it,
you’re unclogging bottles from Alausa, pure water packs from Fadeyi
and perhaps a Yatch or two from Ikoyi!

3. Gateman
There’s nothing wrong about holding doors open for people. Gates on
the other hand, are a problem.
It would drive me crazy, repeating that simple process of walking to
a car, looking at the occupants as if they were all under suspicion,
walking to the gate, dragging it open, dragging it shut, and then
waiting for when the people who just drove in minutes ago, want to
leave. Then the other 90% of the time, you’re sitting out there in
the sun doing absolutely nothing.

2. Chauffeur
People always complain about the Lagos, Abuja, Port Harcourt and so
on traffic. The only people who don’t are Drivers. Why? They’ve seen
it all. All sorts of traffic. The short ones. The long ones. The ones
that end at the next red Light, and the ones that end in another
state. They’ve spent hours on 3rd Mainland enjoying the view.
They’ve understood the inner workings of that Iyana Ipaja. They
have a fond relationship with Ibadan Expressway.
I’m not talking about cab drivers, who spend a lot of time coasting
around eyeballing pedestrians and dreaming up impossible price fares.
I don’t think anyone who hasn’t been a driver can adequately
appreciate how much misery the job must entail.

1. NSCDC Lagos Commandant
Man! This is a major contender for the worst job in Nigeria. You
know Mr Shem of course. And if you don’t you need to watch this .
Let’s just put it this way, there’s no man in town who is the brunt
of as many jokes as this poor fellow.
First came the memes
And merchandise.
And a remix.
And a skank
And next maybe a Harlem Shake!!
credits: miabaga.com
Culled from : http://blog.ngcareers.com/832/top-nine-worst-jobs-to-have-right-now-in-nigeria/