1. Be willing to initiate sex. Men equate sex with
desirability. Help your man to feel desired by
expressing your love in a physical way.
2. Be open to experimentation. It can be easy to get
comfortable and fear of the unknown can stop you
from being open to different sexual experiences. Allow
your man to try new things with you. If you won’t,
there will be someone else who will. I’m not saying to
engage in sexual activity you find repulsive but allow
yourself to experience new things with the man you
love.
3. Don’t over-accomodate. Sometimes in a
relationship, a woman can become too
accommodating. Men get into relationships with a very
clear picture of what a lifetime partner looks like and
this is often in stark contrast to whom he may have
dated casually. Women work to become the person
their partner wants them to be and in doing so, they
lose themselves. One day, their man realizes this is
what he asked for but he isn’t sure it’s what he really
wants. Maintain a healthy sense of self in your
relationship.
4. Don’t become too controlling. Often without
realizing it, when we get into relationships we attempt
to control the other person to do what works best for
us. We engage in destructive relationship habits such
as complaining, blaming, criticizing, nagging,
threatening, punishing and bribing or rewarding to
control.
5. Make sure he knows how much you appreciate
him. Sometimes when women “get” the guy and
get married, they begin to get a false sense of
security. Remember, all relationships are voluntary. A
person can leave at any time. With an over
50% divorce rate in this country, we need to
remember how important it is to maintain a positive
relationship, not simply to acquire one.
6. Let him have time to himself. Some men cheat
because they begin to feel hemmed in by the
relationship. Engaging in an affair can provide them
the sense of freedom they lose in a relationship. Allow
your man time for himself without you. Don’t try to
monopolize all your guy’s time. Be open to time apart
for him to spend with friends, pursue hobbies, etc. so
he does not feel he has no freedom.
7. Be aware of your emotions. Whether or not we are
aware of it, women are masters at using their
emotions to communicate volumes without speaking
any words. We communicate anger, rage, sadness and
disappointment that is received by our partners.
Instead of taking that as a cue to do something
different, some men begin to look for another partner
who idolizes them the way you used to. Don’t forget,
your man wants to know he lights you up not that he
is constantly disappointing you.
8. Prioritize your relationship. Often, when a man
cheats, you will find the woman is also having an
“affair” that’s not sexual. It’s more socially
appropriate. This “affair” takes the form of prioritizing
something, anything, over the relationship. This could
be a job, children, a sick relative, a charity or anything
that puts her man lower on her totem pole than the
first position.
9. Learn his love language. If you are not familiar with
Dr. Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages, please
read it. It has the potential to save more marriages
than marriage counseling has. Learn your man’s love
language and speak it to him regularly. He will know
he is loved and remain true to you.
10. Find his relationship pattern. I do not know how
to combat the biology argument. Some men simply
believe it is hard wired into their genes to have sexual
relations with as many women as they can. If this is
your man, it probably won’t matter what you do. Try
to recognize these men early on by asking about
their dating history.
If this is a pattern with your man, he probably isn’t
likely to change just because you love him best. Your
best defense against this problem is to be
discriminating at the onset.
Credits: yourtango
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